Remains of love

I’ll love you until the end.
A couple
Hugging, kissing.

I love you
Even if the death takes me
Even if the illness is killing my memory.

I love you

You’re the beginning and the end.
The new and the old
The fire and the ice

I love you

My body is suffering
My mind too
But… Me and you.

I love you
I love you

Time flee
And your souvenir too
What will stay in the end ?

I love you

A whisper says.
Something floats in the air
A fragrance, a melody who sings

I love you

Reminbering me of your smile
Green eyes for ever lost
Drowning in an ocean of tears

I love you

I hate you too
You let me
Giving me up on this Earth

I love you

But I am so tired sometimes
So tired to suffer and to wait
Will peace come soon ?

Will I see you soon ?
O dear, I have waited such a longtime
Losing day after day who I am.

I love you

It is time.
Time to give up.
In the end, only ashes remain.

© Violet Suki, 2018

Happy Birthday Ram!

I was thinking of you today, wondering what could I do to celebrate this special day. I finished by making some cakes for you. I hope you appreciate, too bad you’re living in Hungary and me in France. 😀
At least you can see I was not lying.

But I am not so cruel — just a little. ;D

Yesterday I was listening to the radio when I heard a song of Mylène Farmer (a french singer) and in listening the words I thought it was the perfect gift for you.
The video is beautiful and sad too but has no real meaning with what is said in the song. Despite that, I want to share this one with you and let you judge by yourself : Sans contrefaçon – Mylène Farmer

The song said this :

As we have to choose
With soft words I can say it
Without doubt
I am a boy
And for an empire
I will not undress
As without doubt
I am a boy
__
Alone in my closet
My eyes outlined with black
Away from prying eyes
I defy the chance
In this world without meaning
I do what please me
A handkerchief in the warmth of my pant
I am Chevalier d’Eon
__
As we have to choose
With soft words I can say it
Without doubt
I am a boy
And for an empire
I will not undress
As without doubt
I am a boy
__
In turns they chase me
From your companies
I don’t admit they threaten
My resolutions
I don’t give a dare what other people say
I am chameleon
Take care of my tin soldiers
Those will kill you
__
As we have to choose
With soft words I can say it
Without doubt
I am a boy
And for an empire
I will not undress
As without doubt
I am a boy
___

This is my first gift. And come the second.
After this anguished video I wanted to lighten the atmosphere, so I send you this video that I hope will make you smile :
Monsieur

I know you like and know a lot about French History. But I don’t know if you have seen the serie ‘Versailles’. Personally I did. Like in Alexander, they took some liberties with the reality. After all it is not a hystoric classroom but an advertisement. It is really interesting and fun. I like particularly Philippe d’Orléans’ character, known under the nickname of ‘Monsieur’ — shortcut for Monsieur le frère du roi or if you prefer Mister the king’s brother.

Philippe was obliged by his mother to live like a woman since childhood with the aim to weaken him and broke all rivalry between the two brothers.

Here a painting of the two brothers: On the left the future Louis XVI and Philippe, on the right, dressed like a girl.

To keep him company in his young years, he had a friend, another boy François-Timoléon de Choisy, obliged too to live and dress like a girl to his eighteen years old. Like Monsieur this boy will have an unusual destiny. This one, known under the nicknames of Madame de Sancy or Comtesse des Barres, came from a bourgeois family. He became the abbey of Choisy. All his life and despite the fact he was an abbey he continued to dress like a woman seducing under this appearance a lot of woman. Like what… 😀

As for Philippe, he was openly gay even if in this age this word didn’t exist, neither homosexuality. So he was what he was. They only talked about ‘Italian vice’ when they speak about this. And the Italian people called it the French vice. 😀

Married twice, he fulfilled his royal duty in having children and tightening some alliance. The funny things are that the most of the European royal families today come from him and his descendants, not from his beloved brother Louis.

Despite his feminine attitude he was a great military man, engaged and brave, respected by his men. He has an unusual destiny and only one weakness Chevalier, his lover. And despite all, he was always faithfull to his brother. I hope you will enjoy the video and appreciate the character. And I incite you to see the serie if it is not already done. Or even read about his life. He inspire me a lot as character.

Happy birthday my friend !
BTW the cakes were delicious ! 😀

New update on fanfiction for Nothing Is Ever Finished

Finally the support team of fanfiction.net did a good job. I found back all my writing on my page. So, for those who missed it, there is a new updated of Nothing Is Ever Finished:
The second and last part of chapter 11.

Diogenes of Sinope wrote to Alexander the Great…

Puget_-_Diogenes_Alexander_LouvrePeople can appreciate or not Oliver Stone’s movie : Alexander. But I will never thank him enough to make me discover Alexander the great’s life. The film had the merit to give me the need to know more. And since then, I continued to read and learn about this great man. I started first to write some fan fiction. But even if I write fiction and fantasy, I always use a historical base which obliges me to do a lot of research. What I like a lot.

Lately translating a note, for the last chapter of ‘Nothing is ever finished’, about Diogenes of Sinope and reading again my french notes, some questioning crossed my mind. And I decided to write a little article about it. I have no other presence than to share my reflexions in instant.

Diogenes of Sinope (philosopher, Cynic school) sent those words to Alexander the Great when this one was already a king. In the letter of which we know only some fragments, he says :

« If you wish to become beautiful and good, throw the rags on your head and come to us. However you will not be able to do it, because you are hold by Hephaistion’s thighs. »
(Sources : Letter 24)

Erudites translate the first sentence by : give up power and possession and join a life of simplicity. Simplicity that Diogenes applied to himself, living humbly.

Jean-Léon_Gérôme_-_Diogenes_-_Walters_37131

The rags being a metaphor for the crown that from now Alexander wore, symbol of his fonction and power.

Out of context, it is difficult to know if Diogenes, in the second sentence, meant that in reality it was Hephaistion who owned the reins of power as the letter seems to presuppose. But, at last this shows that the relationship between Alexander and Hephaistion was known. And that in the eyes of their contemporaries, and in regard of what Diogenes suggested, it was not platonic.

And knowing that, in his writing, Diogenes advocated all total freedom in sexuality, it is unlikely that it was a criticism about this aspect but rather the way Alexander let Hephaistion have some power upon him.

Did Diogene suggest that Hephaistion was eager for power ?

In regard of his life, it could seem that he had a lot of ambition. And it could explain the dislike that some people in Alexander’s entourage has against him. I don’t think the other was less avid of power but Hephaistion succeeded where the others failed.

But we can consider this sentence under other aspects.
Could it be that Diogenes suggest that Alexander was the slave of his desires forgetting what is essential in Diogenes’ opinion ?

Or else, could Diogenes suggest that Alexander was wrong to love Hephaistion ? The philosopher thought love as being absurd. In his opinion, people hadn’t to grow attached to someone else. This joins in a way the previous question.

In Politeia, Diogenes preached the freedom and the detachment : sexual freedom, self-sufficiency, suppression of money and weapon, the indifference to the grave, the negation of sacred but too the equality between woman and man, and more. He tried to free himself from the social conventions. And questioned the value of his world. The modernity of his thought shook up, and explain certainly that his work was forgotten. In fact, some philosophers close of cynic philosophy preferred to forget this inheritance who seemed too embarrassing.

Some News…. About “Nothing Is Ever Finished”

Hello !

Long time since I updated. I was busy. But I don’t forget my readers. Actually I am finishing to translate the last chapter of Nothing Is Ever Finished. — I wonder if it was wise to name this story like this. Because I fell sometimes that I will never finished it. Kidding ! 😄 — And so, I will update soon the story. But I have one problem. Previously I updated my stories on FanFiction.net. But it appeared that my stories and my poetry was removed without my knowledge from my profil page on FanFiction. So I asked some help from the support team of FanFiction for explanation. Strangely my works is not removed from the FanFiction App. 😳 So… I don’t know what the problem is.

Actually, I can’t update on Fanfiction. But I am working on putting on line my stories on my catalog (see the link on the top menu) on Pressbooks. It was my intention since a long time. But, before to do that, I wanted to take time to make some corrections on the text. Because my grammar is really bad in some chapters.  Too, I wanted to restructure the chapters. And so, because I have not found anglophone beta reader to help me with the correction.

But cause of these circonstances, I will update the story despite my bad grammar. I will work on it later.